divorce Archives - Page 5 of 11 - Lonich Patton Ehrlich Policastri

Surviving The Holidays During A Divorce

December 3, 2014/in Family Law /by Mitchell Ehrlich

The holidays are a time for family, friends, and togetherness. For the recently divorced or those in the process of a divorce, the holidays can be a very sad, confusing, and lonely time; especially for those couples with children. Lonich Patton Erlich Policastri, LLP have put together three tips to get you through the holidays this year: plan ahead, socialize, and create new traditions.

Plan Ahead

The first and most important step to ensuring you survive the holidays is planning ahead. This includes planning out where your children will spend their holidays and with whom. Depending on your custody plan, there are inevitably going to be holes in your schedule and during those time, loneliness may be unavoidable. One way to avoid being lonely during these times is to get activities on the calendar. If your children will be with your former spouse this year, plan activities with friends and family to keep you busy. While keeping yourself busy may be essential to surviving the holidays, it is also essential to leave some time for rest and reflection, so try not to over commit yourself.

Socialize

The more the merrier. It is common knowledge that the more people you surround yourself with, the better your mood will be. Just because your children are with your former spouse, does not mean you have to spend the holidays home alone. This holiday season, be sure to interact with others, whether it be with family or friends. Socializing will help you avoid feelings of sadness, loneliness, and depression. If you used to spend your holidays with your in-laws, find somewhere else to go this year. Do not be afraid to crash a holiday party or two. And remember, it is normal to feel out of place and uncomfortable, but the more you socialize, the better you will feel.

Create New Traditions

Divorce means letting go. This includes letting go of certain family traditions. Now that you are divorced, your holiday traditions are bound to change. This is your opportunity to keep the traditions you enjoy, get rid of those you do not, and create new and better traditions with your children. Take this time to try something you have always wanted to do, were too scared to do, or something your former would never let you and the children do. Also, if your children are spending this holiday with your former spouse, consider celebrating the same holiday with your children on an alternate day.

These are just some of the many tips available to survive the holidays during your divorce. The Certified Family Law Specialists at Lonich Patton Erlich Policastri have decades of experience handling complex family law matters. If you are interested in learning more about scheduling where your children will spend the holidays, please contact Lonich Patton Erlich Policastri for further information. Keep in mind that each individual situation is unique and results discussed in this post are not a guarantee of future results. While this post may include legal issues, it is not legal advice. Use of this site does not create an attorney-client relationship.

Who gets the family pet in a divorce?

October 27, 2014/in Estate Planning, Family Law /by David Patton

If I had to ask you to put a price on your dog, cat or your pet hermit crab, could you? For some, perhaps they could but the vast majority would likely agree that their pets are priceless. However, disputes regarding who gets the family pet in divorce proceedings has become commonplace in family law.

Earlier this year, Melanie Griffith and Antonio Banderas made a statement that they were ending their two-decade marriage but vowed to remain friends and to move forward lovingly. However, shortly after, reports surfaced that a custody battle was flaring up – not over their 17 year old daughter, but over the couple’s three dogs.

Although these days some people treat their pets better than their own children, in the eyes of the law pets are still only considered the property of their owners, much like their furniture is[1]. Legal experts agree that pet owners invest hundreds sometimes thousands of dollars and hours researching proper training, good food choices, and the perfect toys, groomers and veterinarians for their pets. Those same individuals might also take precautions with their estate by writing a prenuptial agreement. But how often do those pet owners think about legal issues associated with pet ownership?

Family law attorneys agree that the best way to handle a situation with a pet is to put it in a prenup. If you came into your relationship with Maxwell, put it in writing that if you are to leave the relationship Maxwell is coming with you. If you and your significant other purchased a pet together during the relationship, but you both agree that one of you should have the pet in the event of a breakup, a post-nuptial agreement would make sure that in the event of a divorce or separation the pet would go with the spouse more bonded with the animal.

Without something in writing, trouble could land you arguing in court. Last year a New York judge granted a divorcing couple the right to engage in oral arguments over pet custody for the first time in the state’s judicial history. The landmark legal showdown was ultimately averted. The couple settled out of court.

In the event of a heated breakup, pets can be protected. If a party feels that he/she and the pet is in danger at the hands of the other party, California law provides for the family pet to be included on a protective order. Since 2008, courts have had the ability to make an order that the restrained person stay away from the pet. Family Code Section 6320 provides that upon a showing of good cause, the court may include in a protective order a grant of the exclusive care, possession, or control of any animal owned, possessed, leased, kept, or held by the spouse or minor child resident in the residence.

Family Code section 6320 makes strides toward addressing the established connection between animal abuse and family violence commonly referred to as the “Link.”[2] One of the first studies that described this Link found that of a survey of women with pets who had entered a shelter in northern Utah, seventy-one percent reported that their partner had threatened or actually hurt or killed one or more of their pets.[3]Another study of fifty of the largest shelters in the United States found that eighty-five percent of battered women and sixty-three percent of children with pets had experienced incidents of pet abuse.[4] An alarming consequence of these studies is that victims may feel that they cannot leave their abuser because they worry for the safety of their pets.

The Certified Family Law Specialists at Lonich Patton Erlich Policastri have decades of experience handling complex family law matters. If you are interested in learning more about prenuptial or post-nuptial agreements, please contact the Certified Family Law Specialists at Lonich Patton Erlich Policastri for further information. Please remember that each individual situation is unique and results discussed in this post are not a guarantee of future results. While this post may include legal issues, it is not legal advice. Use of this site does not create an attorney-client relationship.

[1] Kimes v. Grosser (2011) 195 Cal.App.4th 1556

[2] Am. Humane Ass’n, Learn About the Link, http://www.americanhumane.org/site/PageServer?pagename=lk_about (last visited Aug. 4, 2007); see also Senate Judiciary Committee, Committee Analysis of SB 353, at 2-5 (Mar. 27, 2007) (explaining the connection between animal abuse and family violence). There are also several studies that report that children who witness abuse, or are abused themselves, tend to, in turn, abuse animals. See Phil Arkow & Tracy Coppola, Expanding Protective Orders to Include Companion Animals 5 (2007), http://www.americanhumane.org/site/DocServer/PetsinPO2007.pdf? docID=5061 (describing the harmful effects upon children of witnessing domestic violence).

[3] Frank R. Ascione, Battered Women’s Reports of Their Partners’ and Their Children’s Cruelty to Animals, 1 J. Emotional Abuse 119, 125 (1998).

[4] Frank R. Ascione et al., The Abuse of Animals and Domestic Violence: A National Survey of Shelters for Women Who are Battered, 5 Soc’y & Animals 205, 211-12 tbl.1 (1997), available at http:// www.syeta.org/sa/sa5.3/Ascione.html.

The Ways to End Your Marriage

August 8, 2014/in Family Law /by Mitchell Ehrlich

In California, a marriage is dissolved by (1) the death of a spouse, (2) a final judgment of divorce, or (3) an annulment. Alternatively, if spouses do not want to completely end their marriage but do want to terminate their marital rights, they can (4) file for legal separation. Here is a look into each one:

(1) Death of a Spouse

When a spouse dies, dissolution occurs automatically, as a matter of law. This can be significant in family law proceedings if the spouse dies after divorce proceedings have begun, but before a final judgment of dissolution. In this scenario, spousal status is not officially terminated and the surviving spouse will still be considered “married” for inheritance purposes. Additionally, any pending dissolution proceeding is rendered moot at the death of a spouse and the court has no power to hear any remaining unresolved issues.

(2) Divorce

Divorce is the proceeding that legally ends the marriage or domestic partnership. Under Family Code section 2310, the grounds for divorce may be either “irreconcilable differences” or “incurable insanity.” Most marriages are dissolved on the ground of “irreconcilable differences.” A dissolution granted on the grounds of “incurable insanity” requires evidence – including competent medical or psychiatric testimony – that your spouse is incurably insane. In fact, this ground is so uncommon that there are no known reported decisions defining “incurable insanity” in the dissolution context. Further, it offers no tactical advantage so even if your spouse is incurably insane, pleading irreconcilable differences is much easier.

The determination of whether “irreconcilable differences” exist is essentially a ministerial function and is rarely a matter of contention. California is a no-fault divorce state, which means that any evidence of specific acts of misconduct (such as cheating, gambling, or heavy drinking) is improper. Courts recognize that ending a marriage is an intensely personal decision and only need to be convinced that the marital differences are substantial. Thus, direct proof of objective reasons supporting the divorce is not required.

(3) Annulment

An annulment declares the marriage was not legally valid – it was never entered into – and like other defenses to contracts, an annulment can occur if one party was not of sound-mind at the time of the marriage or if the marriage was procured by fraud.

A famous example of an annulment due to lack of capacity is Ms. Britney Spears’ 55-hour marriage to her high school friend, Jason Alexander, in Las Vegas. Ms. Spears sought an annulment stating that she “lacked understanding of her actions to the extent that she was incapable of agreeing to the marriage because she and Alexander did not know each other’s likes and dislikes, each other’s desires to have or not have children, and each other’s desires as to State of residency.” In other words, she was drunk and this was a joke that went too far.

Marriages can be annulled for fraud, if the fraud relates to a matter that California deems vital to the marriage relationship and the fraud directly affects the purpose of the party deceived entering the marital contract. Usually, annulments based on fraud involve the sexual and procreative aspects of marriage, such as a secret intention not to live with the other spouse or a concealment of sterility. False representations about earning capacity, wealth, or social status are not the type of fraud that will warrant a nullity. Nor will a failure to fulfill wedding vows or commonly understood spousal obligations, such as being a loving and supporting partner.

(4) Legal Separation

The grounds for legal separation are the same as those for a divorce but it does not end the marriage. Legal separation is an alternative to divorce, where the spouses do not want to completely sever the legal status of the marriage. Otherwise, a legal separation operates similarly to a divorce, separating all finances and property.

Spouses often seek a legal separation for religious or other personal reasons, or to retain eligibility for medical insurance, veteran’s benefits, or social security benefits that would have otherwise been lost by a divorce.

If you have any questions about the proper way to end your marriage, please contact our California Certified Family Law Specialists. Our attorneys have decades of experience handling complex family law proceeds and offer a free consultation.

Please remember that each individual situation is unique and results discussed in this post are not a guarantee of future results. While this post may include legal issues, it is not legal advice. Use of this site does not create an attorney-client relationship.

Tax and Estate Planning for Same-Sex Couples

August 1, 2014/in Estate Planning, In the Community, Probate /by David Patton

Earlier this week, the U.S. Court of Appeals for the 4th Circuit struck down Virginia’s same-sex marriage ban, saying that withholding the fundamental right to marry from same-sex couples is a form of segregation that the Constitution cannot tolerate.

In June 2013, the Supreme Court of the United States in United States v. Windsor, held that the federal government must recognize same-sex marriages and that it is up to state Legislatures to define marriage within state boundaries. Since then, numerous law-suits challenging the constitutionality of state DOMAs on equal protection and due process grounds have prevailed in various federal and state courts. Currently, 19 states, including California, plus the District of Columbia recognize same-sex marriage (recognition states), while 40 states prohibit it (non-recognition states).

The prevailing prediction is that a Supreme Court guarantee of a right to marriage is on its way. American support for same-sex marriage is at a new high of 55 percent, and California support is at 61 percent and increasing, if the trends continue. It is important for all couples to create an estate plan. Additionally, it is important for same-sex couples to be aware of the potentially complicated issues that arise when they move across state lines.

Same-Sex Couples Living in California

Same-sex married couples now living in California enjoy the same benefits and burdens under state and federal law as married opposite-sex couples. Before Windsor and IRS Revenue Ruling 2013-17 (which extended federal tax benefits to married same-sex couples, regardless of their state of residency), many married opposite-sex couples likely took this preferential treatment for granted.

Some of these benefits include:

Property transferred between spouses incident to a divorce is not subject to income or gift tax;
Spousal support (alimony) payments are tax deductible to the paying spouse;
Child support payments are not subject to income tax;
Spouses receive a community interest in 401(k) accounts and other retirement plans; and
Spouses receive all community property and anywhere from one-third to all of the deceased spouse’s separate property for intestate (when a person dies without a will or other non-probate instrument) inheritance purposes.

All couples should be aware of their legal rights at marriage, divorce, and death. It is important for both same-sex couples and opposite-sex couples to consider pre-marital agreements, estate plans, and any tax consequences that arise from marriage or divorce.

The Marital Status of Migrating Same-Sex Couples

When a same-sex couple moves out of California, their marital status will depend on the other state’s law with regards to various issues including, state tax filing status, intestate succession, guardianship and conservatorship appointments, and adoption and artificial reproductive technologies. In other words, a non-recognition state may not recognize the otherwise valid same-sex marriage.

If and when the Supreme Court guarantees a right to marriage, moving across state lines will no longer be an issue for same-sex couples. However, in the interim, it is important to be aware of the possible legal consequences.

For example, under Florida law, the definition of “heir” does not include same-sex spouses for intestate inheritance purposes. This means that a same-sex couple that was married in California, but permanently living in Florida, will not inherit from each other under the Florida intestate system. Some courts in non-recognition states are willing to recognize same-sex marriage in certain contexts through the doctrine of comity, which is where a court gives deference to another state’s laws. However, most surviving spouses want to avoid litigation because it can be a headache, requiring time, money, and mental energy.

In some cases, it might be worthwhile for same-sex spouses to opt out of the intestate system with non-probate instruments, such as estate plans. A same-sex couple’s estate plan needs to be drafted with precision, specifically naming beneficiaries, rather than using general terms such as “spouse.” This becomes especially important if a same-sex couple moves to a non-recognition state, where the court may not interpret a same-sex spouse to qualify as a spouse or heir. If any other blood related heirs of the deceased spouse were to contest the non-probate instrument, they could end up inheriting property that would have gone to the same-sex spouse in California or another recognition state.

If you are a same-sex couple and are considering marriage, or need to create or update an estate plan, please contact our California Certified Family Law Specialists. Our attorneys have decades of experience handling complex family law and estate planning matters and offer a free consultation.

Please remember that each individual situation is unique and results discussed in this post are not a guarantee of future results. While this post may include legal issues, it is not legal advice. Use of this site does not create an attorney-client relationship.

“No good marriage ever ended in divorce” – Louis C.K.

July 30, 2014/in Family Law /by Gina Policastri

“Divorce is always good news. I know that sounds weird, but it’s true because no good marriage has ever ended in divorce. That would be sad. If two people were married and they just had a great thing … and then they got divorced, that would be really sad. But that has happened zero times.”

-Louis C.K.

This inevitably leads to the question: what is a “good” marriage? Likely, the answer is there are no good or bad marriages. Instead there are a range of risk factors associated with divorce. When two people get married, they usually aren’t thinking that the marriage will end in divorce. But then hard times arise and sometimes they find themselves thinking either casually or seriously about divorce. Is there a way to know if your marriage is statistically likely to end in divorce? Below, we will take a look at some of the most common risk factors in the United States.

Current state of divorce

In the United States, researchers estimate that 40 to 50 percent of all first marriages will end in divorce or permanent separation. The risk of divorce is even higher for second marriages at about 60 percent. Divorce has always been present in American society although it has become more common in the last 50 years. Surprisingly, the highest divorce rates ever recorded were in the 1970’s and 1980’s. Since then the divorce rate has actually decreased a little but still remains at a historically high rate.

Researchers have found that individuals considering divorce make their decision to stay or leave based on the rewards they gain from the marriage, the barriers against leaving the marriage, their perceptions about finding a better relationship, and the amount of investment they have made in their marriage.

Barriers to leaving a marriage, such as concerns about money and the effects of family breakup on their children, can keep marriages together in the short term. However, unless there is improvement in the relationship, eventually the barriers are usually not enough to keep a marriage together in the long run.

What factors are associated with a higher risk for divorce?

The statistics which show that almost half of all marriages end in divorce might make it seem like staying married has the same odds as roulette – namely 50/50. However, research has identified various factors that are associated with a higher risk for divorce. Some couples may have a low risk and others might have a higher risk of divorcing. Understanding these factors may not directly help improve your marriage or make a decision about getting divorced, but they may help couples understand why they’re facing challenges. Researchers have identified the most common factors as:

Young Age. Marrying at a young age increases your likelihood of divorce, especially in the early years of marriage. People who married in their teens are at dramatically higher risk for divorce than those who married as early as age 21 or 22.
Less education. Researchers estimate that individuals who have some college education as opposed to not finishing high school have a lower chance of divorce. Investing in an education is a good way to build a foundation for a better marriage, not just a better job.
Less income. Tied to education is income. Research has estimated that individuals with incomes exceeding $50,000 have a lower chance of divorce. Finances can be stressful and having at least a modest income can help couples avoid stresses that can lead to divorce. If you argue with your spouse about finances once a week, your marriage is 30 percent more likely to end in divorce than if you argue less frequently about finances.
Premarital childbearing and pregnancy. In America, more than one-third (37%) of children are born to parents who are not married, and few of these parents eventually marry. Most of those parents will separate before the child begins school, some will never really get together.
If you have a daughter, you’re 5% more likely to divorce. This figure multiplies with the number of daughters. Researchers believe that this happens because fathers are more invested in family life when they have boys.
If you or your partner have had a previous marriage. Data shows that second (or third or fourth) marriages should be more successful than first marriages. However, this statistic is skewed by serial marriages and researchers have been unable to take the Elizabeth Taylors out of the equation.
Parents’ divorce. Of course, some risk factors for divorce you can’t control. If you experienced the divorce of your parents, unfortunately, that doubles your risk for divorce. If your spouse witnessed their parents’ divorce, then your risk more than triples. This does not doom your marriage to failure but rather suggests that individuals who experienced the divorce of their parents need to work harder to make good marriage choices and to keep their marriage strong and happy.
Same-sex marriages are more likely to end in divorce. Although the LGBT community is just starting to have legally recognized marriages in the United States, a research team led by Stockholm University on legal partnerships in Norway and Sweden found that male same-sex marriages are 50 percent more likely to end in divorce than a heterosexual marriage. If you’re a female in a same-sex marriage, this figure soars to 167 percent.

These are only a few risk factors that researchers have identified and none of them represent automatic doom for a marriage. However, if a number of these and other risk factors are present, seeking pre-marital or other counseling may be recommended, even if nothing seems wrong at the moment. Much like roulette, one can increase the odds in their favor by learning more about marriage, themselves and their partners.

If divorce seems inevitable, it is also recommended that couples take time to try to fix the relationship through counseling or some other professional service before making the decision to call it quits. However, we understand that sometimes there are no alternatives besides divorce.

If you are considering divorce or have questions about divorce planning, please contact our California Certified Family Law Specialists (as certified by the State Bar of California Board of Legal Specialization). Our attorneys have decades of experience handling complex family law proceedings and offer a free consultation.

Please remember that each individual situation is unique and results discussed in this post are not a guarantee of future results. While this post may detail general legal issues, it is not legal advice. Use of this site does not create an attorney-client relationship.

How Much Does Divorce Cost?

July 22, 2014/in Family Law /by Gretchen Boger

Divorce can be really expensive. For example, the 2007 Connecticut divorce between travel entrepreneur, Peter Tauck, and his ex-wife racked up around $13 million in legal fees. The bill reflected two years of highly-contested litigation costs, including nearly 700 filings and an 86-day trial. It is common for such strikingly high-cost divorces to reach news headlines, but how much does getting a divorce really cost?

Plenty of websites have popped up that promise an “easy and affordable divorce” ranging from $99 to $300. These cheap alternatives may be enticing, and could be useful for couples who have few assets and agree on every aspect of child custody and visitation – they just need lawyers to fill out the required forms.

However, most spouses disagree about at least a few things in connection with their divorce. One of the most hotly contested issues is often child custody and visitation. California courts require divorcing parents to attend mediation to see if custody issues can be resolved without a trial, and they often can be. However, in some cases it is necessary to have a child custody evaluation, which can be either broad or specific in scope. This involves retaining a child custody evaluator, who is an expert, usually a forensic therapist or psychologist. The evaluator meets with both parties, the children, and sometimes collateral contacts, and then prepares a report to assist the court in making custody and visitation orders. Evaluations range substantially in cost, which is usually divided equally between the parties.

Aside from custody disputes, divorces mostly concern money and can require complicated financial calculations to determine and equitably divide the community’s interest in your marital estate. Such calculations may include the percentage you contributed to your 401(k) during marriage, or the amount of post-separation mortgage payments on the family home. Sometimes these issues are complicated enough to require hiring a CPA or a forensic accountant. In addition, many people receive stock options, or RSU’s as part of their employment compensation packages, and it can be necessary to retain an expert for division. Further, sometimes it is necessary to obtain real property appraisals or fair rental surveys, which range in cost depending on the size of the property.

If you and your spouse have acquired a substantial estate, the work to determine the community’s interest and agree on an equitable division can really add up. Even in what seems like a simple case, the cost can be high depending on many factors. Hourly rates for attorneys can range anywhere from $150, at the very low end, up to $1,000. Spouses can definitely expect to pay attorney fees and court costs, and there may be additional costs for parent education classes, co-parent counseling, private mediation, or retaining various experts.

The good news is that most of the cost is a function of how quickly you and your spouse can reach an agreement – it is in part under your control. If agreement cannot be reached, it may be necessary to file motions, which can cost between $3,000 and $10,000 for preparation and appearance at a hearing. The need for depositions and trial will also increase the cost of your divorce. If you have no assets and no children, it is possible to walk away only spending the filing fees. If you are able to reach a global or partial settlement agreement then the cost of dissolving your marriage will be greatly reduced. However, if you cannot be in the same room as each other without becoming outraged, your divorce could easily cost more than your wedding.

However, if your spouse makes more money than you, or has a greater “access to income,” you may be able to obtain an order for “need-based” attorney’s fees, payable by your spouse. In addition, if your spouse or their attorney is being really unreasonable, you may have the right to obtain sanctions in the form of attorney fees and costs from your spouse. These sanctions can be ordered when conduct frustrates the policy of the law to promote settlement.

On July 13, 2014, a Nebraska man, Michael Peterson, plead no contest to the first degree murder of his divorce attorney. After an unsuccessful malpractice suit seeking reimbursement for over $57,000 in attorney fees, Peterson shot his divorce attorney in the back with a high-velocity rifle. In order to avoid murderous rage upon receiving your bill, it is important to have an open and honest conversation about fees and costs, and ask for an estimated budget before going to trial.

Please be aware, however, that it is simply impossible to accurately estimate the cost of your divorce – there are too many possible factors for anyone to promise a certain outcome for a certain amount. If you have questions or are worried about the cost of your upcoming divorce, please contact our California Certified Family Law Specialists. Our attorneys have decades of experience handling complex family law matters and offer a free consultation.

Please remember that each individual situation is unique and results discussed in this post are not a guarantee of future results. While this post may include legal issues, it is not legal advice. Use of this site does not create an attorney-client relationship.

How Facebook Can Affect Your Divorce

July 2, 2014/in Family Law, In the Community /by Gretchen Boger

Last February 2013, a New York Father was awarded sole custody after a Mother utilized Facebook to “insult and demean” her ten year old child. The Court found that Father was “more able to provide a stable and nurturing environment” for the children, citing Mother’s “inappropriate use of the Internet and lack of remorse or insight into the appropriateness of such behavior.”

Social media can play a dangerous role during divorce proceedings. Facebook, which now has more than 800 million active users, has become an important and undeniable presence in today’s culture. Your profile shares and records everything from your personal information, to your new profile picture, and your mood. Your posts may be valuable evidence to your ex-spouse’s divorce attorney.

In recent years there has been an increase, especially in family law cases, of the amount of evidence collected from social media sites. Photographs, updates, and conversations you post online may be admitted into evidence. Further, it might not be a good idea to post about your divorce proceedings. If you do, choose your words carefully and express yourself diplomatically – on the same level as you would present yourself to your judge. This rule of thumb extends to iMessages, emails, Twitter, dating websites, your blog, etc.

Remember that anything online is extremely accessible. If you post anything that contradicts what you have stated in your pleadings, it can impeach your credibility and given the discretionary nature of family law cases, may negatively impact your case. For example, the following Facebook activity often makes its way into the family courtroom:

Posting pictures of an extravagant vacation – you at a resort indulging in the day spa can provide evidence of financial misconduct with regards to spousal support or child support.
Updating your status while inebriated – constant updates with slurred-speech or checking-in to five happy hours each week can suggest you have drug or alcohol dependency problems and sway the judge in awarding custody.
Bad mouthing your divorce proceedings – complaining about your judge or your ex-spouse’s nasty opposing counsel can appear as if you do not take the process seriously.

Even if you have de-friended people who know your ex and made your privacy settings air-tight, your ex may still be able to access your updates. Recently, Facebook was put in the spotlight over a controversial social experiment it conducted to determine whether emotions are contagious (conclusion: they are). Without first getting consent, Facebook manipulated 689,003 user’s News Feeds to display either positive or negative posts and then monitored the users’ reactions. People have had various reactions towards this experiment. Some feel violated for being used as a lab rat. This study is a reminder that regardless of your consent, you never know who has access to or has saved what you posted.

The bottom line: think before updating your Facebook status, especially during divorce proceedings. Online statements are similar to face-to-face conversations but they are much easier to document. Further, the court may consider your posts in your divorce proceedings.

If you have any questions or concerns about your or your spouse’s online presence and how it may affect your divorce, feel free to contact our California Certified Family Law Specialists. Our attorneys have decades of experience handling complex family law proceedings and offer a free consultation.

Please remember that each individual situation is unique and results discussed in this post are not a guarantee of future results. While this post may include legal issues, it is not legal advice. Use of this site does not create an attorney-client relationship.

Mediation: Because Litigation Isn’t Always The Answer

April 2, 2014/in Family Law /by Gretchen Boger

Divorce is rarely fun. Nevertheless, divorce and painful litigation don’t always go hand-in-hand. For many couples, divorce mediation could be the best way to dissolve your marriage, protect your children, and maintain a mature relationship with your spouse.

In family law mediation, a neutral mediator works with a divorcing couple to creatively reach an agreement on some or all of the issues in their divorce. Experienced family law mediators are typically attorneys that understand the legal landscape. A well-versed mediator can help you and your spouse reach a settlement on all aspects of your marriage—financial distribution, child custody, and even child and spousal support.

The mediator does not represent either spouse, but is instead an unbiased facilitator who uses unique strategies that will result in an agreement that meets the needs of both parties. Once all of the issues are covered, the mediator will help the parties create a marital settlement agreement to memorialize their arrangement. At this stage, each party should consult their own attorney to ensure that the agreement is fair and in each party’s best interest. Finally, the agreement is sent to the family court where the agreement will be signed off as an enforceable court order.

Here are just a few reasons why you and your spouse should consider mediating your divorce:

The non-adversarial aspect of mediation can help your and your ex maintain a better, more mature relationship.
Mediation will allow you to keep your “dirty laundry” private, while family law litigation requires parties to discuss their personal issues on the public record.
Because mediation doesn’t require several filings, voluminous court costs, or extensive attorney’s fees, you may be able to reduce your expenses.
Mediation can be much easier on children than family law litigation.
You and your spouse are in charge of the results of your divorce instead of a family law judge.
Mediation may enable you and your spouse to reach an agreement much faster than in typical litigation.

Remember, divorce does not have to involve litigation. At Lonich Patton Erlich Policastri, we provide divorce mediation services to clients throughout the Silicon Valley. Michael E. Lonich facilitates all family law mediations handled by the firm, and he is widely regarded as one of Silicon Valley’s most effective mediators. Michael works closely with parties to help them shape the decisions that will be drafted into the marital settlement agreement. In addition to handling divorce mediations, he has extensive experience in handling business law litigation. He draws on his business background when mediating divorce matters for business owners, executives, foreign nationals and their spouses.

Please note that family law mediation is not recommended for couples with domestic violence issues. If you have any questions about divorce mediation, or divorce in general, and would like to speak to an attorney, please contact Lonich Patton Erlich Policastri for a free initial consultation. Our attorneys can be reached by phone at (408) 553-0801 or through the intake form on our Contact Us page.

Please remember that each individual situation is unique and results discussed in this post are not a guarantee of future results. While this post may detail general legal issues, it is not legal advice. Use of this site does not create an attorney-client relationship.

Does “Shacking Up” Mean We’ll Be “Splitting Up”?

March 17, 2014/in Family Law /by Gina Policastri

As it turns out, cohabitation doesn’t cause divorce after all – but rather, the age at which you cohabitate determines your risk for divorce. For years, social scientists have linked cohabitation with divorce, cautioning couples to resist moving in together by correlating “shacking up” with “splitting up.” However, recent studies reveal that the biggest predictor of divorce is actually the age at which a couple begins living together, whether before the wedding vows or after.

Previous studies compared the divorce rates of couples who cohabitated with those who didn’t by using the age of marriage as the focal variable. Arielle Kuperberg, a sociologist behind the new studies, used a different variable: Kuperberg compared the relationships using the date of first moving in together. That date, she reasoned, is when a couple really takes on marriage roles, regardless of whether they have a legal certificate. Using this novel method, Kuperberg found no link between whether people had cohabited before marriage and their rate of divorce. She also found that the turning point in age for picking a life partner appears to be around 23, an age that likely coincides with college graduation. “That’s when people are able to pick a partner who is more compatible,” she explains. “Maybe they are a little more mature. They’re a little set up in the world.”

Sociologists also discovered that while moving in may be irrelevant to divorce rates, rushing into cohabitation may have its disadvantages. Sharon Sassler, a sociologist at Cornell University, found that most cohabitors with college degrees move in together only after a long stretch of dating. On the other hand, more than half of the cohabiters without college degrees move in together after less than six months of dating. Sassler explained this phenomenon through financial motivators: financial need seems to push the less well-off into romantic roommate situations before they are ready, increasing the chances that the relationship will dissolve. Therefore, Sassler argues that it is the type of premarital cohabitation that predicts divorce, and not necessarily cohabitation in itself.

If you are interested in cohabitating with your partner and are concerned with your rights in the event the relationship dissolves, please contact our California Certified Family Law Specialists (as certified by the State Bar of California Board of Legal Specialization). Having a knowledgeable, experienced family law attorney by your side can prove to be invaluable for resolving your concerns. Lonich Patton Erlich Policastri’s attorneys have decades of experience handling complex family law proceedings and offer a free half-hour consultation.

Please remember that each individual situation is unique and results discussed in this post are not a guarantee of future results. While this post may include legal issues, it is not legal advice. Use of this site does not create an attorney-client relationship.

Sources: http://news.yahoo.com/best-predictor-divorce-age-couples-cohabit-study-says-131122832.html?soc_src=mediacontentstory; http://www.foxnews.com/health/2014/03/10/cohabitation-doesnt-cause-divorce-after-all/

Beware: Sign Your MSA With Care

March 12, 2014/in Family Law /by Gretchen Boger

A Marital Settlement Agreement (or “MSA”) is essentially a contract between a divorced couple that memorializes the division of property and debt. The document also allows the parties to include almost anything they desire in the agreement, such as who will provide support for adult children. The MSA is usually incorporated into the final judgment and signed by the judge, giving the contract the same effect of a court order.

Due to the finality and force of an MSA that has gone before the judge, promises made in the agreement should be made very carefully and taken very seriously. If you agree to something in your MSA, you must be prepared to follow through. One New Jersey father* learned that the hard way and will be required to provide fifty percent of the support his daughter needs at Cornell law school, per the MSA he signed with his ex-wife.

The father argued that although he agreed to help his daughter with her higher-education costs, he wanted to have a say in where she studied and where she lived. Not surprisingly, he wished her to choose a less-expensive alternative, but she chose Cornell. As of today, Cornell law school’s cost of attendance is around $80,000.

In the end, this father must pay about $120,000 for half of his daughter’s legal education because the agreement did not include typical language that would have given father a say in his daughter’s educational decisions. MSA’s are serious business; this situation is one example why it pays to have a great attorney looking out for your interests.

If you need guidance creating your MSA or are interested in creating a prenuptial agreement, please contact our California Certified Family Law Specialists (as certified by the State Bar of California Board of Legal Specialization). Our attorneys have decades of experience handling MSA’s and complex family law proceedings, and happily offer a free consultation to new clients.

Please remember that each individual situation is unique and results discussed in this post are not a guarantee of future results. While this post may include legal issues, it is not legal advice. Use of this site does not create an attorney-client relationship.

*“Dad must pay half of his daughter’s law school expenses at Cornell, appeals court says,” via ABA Journal: http://www.abajournal.com/news/article/dad_must_pay_half_of_his_daughters_law_school_expenses_at_cornell_appeals_c

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Beware: Sign Your MSA With Care

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